I had went to church when i was younger. About four or five but it was short lived my parents were big into drugs and abuse i had to raise my sisters a lot of the time. I remember one time my sister got held hostage for drugs. Another time i snuck to the stairs and seen our kitchen table full of guns. So i dint get to hang out with kids much. I spent alot of time learning and examining how things worked. At the age of seven a man showed up at my door and asked if my parents were home. I told my parents his name and they got the palest look on their faces. Well come to find out he was my real father. My mother and step father and two sisters had to leave for Canada because my parents owed alot to drug dealers. So they asked me if i wanted to live with my real father. I said yes. figured it couldn't be much worse then the abuse from my step father. Well not much changed with my new father. school was rough i got made fun of because i was smart so i hid that witch caused the school to contact my dad which dint help the home life. I was just hurting from everything i remember thinking how could my mom let this happen i was only seven how could she let me make the choice to stay. Then that turned to was I a bad kid. The abuse went on with my father for years he used to get mad at me because i knew things were going to happen be for they did or i would hear some one say something be for they did or didn't at all got in trouble for that too. So I hid that too. I remember praying when i was nine for God to just make the pain stop just take him away or me away. I prayed for death. As we can see it didn't happen. I remember when i got tired of feeling the pain I went out and beat myself with a bike chain until i didn't feel any more pain. One day my dad was beating me and all i could do is laugh at him cause he couldn't hurt me any more. I grabbed the belt and took it i raised it like i was going to hit him Ill never forget what he said. You got one chance boy. as the tears started to flow i gave him the belt back and he laid into my back i remember the hyperventilating made me think i was going to die. And all i could do is love him for he was my father. And a man at his worst is still a man. At this point love became a fleeting memory like a fairy tail. and the physical pain didn't hurt any more but my hart was so scared. All i had was me and God. I had turned to drugs to try to forget the pain. but that dint work. I went to church and there was a kids camp coming up for abused children i was to young to go help but i prayed to God I Said i dint ask for much but for my fifteenth birthday this year could you make it so i could go to this kids camp. so i quit the drugs and sobered up. I was so happy when i got my present. I went there and served those kids with all i had. I was so eager to serve them i drank alot of coffee and got really sick the church members pulled me in to this room and all laid hands on me that was when the spirit hit i was belligerent It was awesome. I went back to the normal routine dad being mad me getting high to cover the pain. Finlay i got sick of it and ran away i went and stayed at a military house i started training my Body while going to school. well my dad sent the cops to pick me up. so finial i ran away to Canada i stayed there awhile and came back my dad was so happy to see me. he thought i had died or something. we had a real big talk. It didn't change nothing things went back to the same thing. well my dad got blinded from a injury at work i prayed so hard for him to heal. thank you God. And nursed him back to health for three or four months. Well God absolutely changed my life he gave me the ability to stand against all odds i got placed into the flames and i have been tempered He has saved my life and always been there for me. And as for my father do not look down upon him he did the best he could with what he had. To any one that reads this i want you to know God is real He can save you he can heal you He is great Thank you God for my life thank you. He can show you love. for all even when they beat him spit on him abandon him talk bad even deny him he still loves them. Thats what jesus/God do for you they help you to love even through the hard times.